I can’t believe my family is moving away from the city. It seems really unfair that they made this decision without me. Like, don’t I even get a say in the matter? I mean, they act like I’m such a big part of their lives and they just make these kinds of decisions without me.
I mean, I’ve lived here all my life. The city is all I know. In the summertime, the pavement sizzles and the streets are packed. I literally run into a different friend, like, once a block. It’s insane how social everything is here and like, all my friends and I are so alike. Winter is pretty cool too because I get to wear my boots and sort of slip-slide around in the snow. My friends always look so chic and stop for a quick chat, no matter how cold it is! I really don’t think I can give that up. I’m like a very social creature. My mom always jokes about how I’m a social butterfly and I don’t even mind because it’s totes true.
I sort of like how compact everything is here, too. My mom is always all, “living in the country is going to be so wonderful because Riley will finally have a place to run around!” and I’m like um bitch since when do I run around? Hello, I take it to the STREETS to strut my STUFF. That is all. None of this ‘running’ nonsense. My dad is like, “I can’t wait until we leave the city and finally get some fresh air!” and I’m all UM RUDE!!! What is wrong with this perfectly good air? We went to the country once for like a long weekend and the air was like ~fine~ but I wouldn’t say it’s like FRESH compared to what we have here. Like I really think he takes all the great smells of the city for granted. Or maybe he can’t smell them like I can because he’s a human? I never thought of that. V interesting.
So today is moving day and I have to say goodbye to my city and my friends forever. I really hope I run into AT LEAST Henry, Lucy, Linus, Innes, Max and Thor. Like AT LEAST them or I won’t be happy.
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Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! Those old neighbors are moving out! I did not like them. They were not nice to me for a number of reasons which I will list here for your convenience:
- They did not like my gardening skills: I always tried to keep their soil properly fertilized and always made sure to rake the soil with the hoe so it would be FRESH but they always said NO HUNTER NO
- They do not like it when I come over and look through their big glass door: I just really want to play with the small dog that they have. The dog is very peculiar to me. He stays inside all the time and just stares. His tail moves a lot and sometimes he hisses which I take as a hello in his native tongue from his home planet.
- They do not like it when I sing along to my sister’s flute playing: What they call “egregious noise,” I call “classical music” To-may-toe/to-mah-toe, right?
- SQUIRREL! What was I talking about?
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FINALLY WE ARE PULLING UP TO OUR NEW HOUSE. I HAVE TO PEE SO, SO BADLY. LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT, LET ME OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!!!
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Oh, boy, oh boy, oh boy! New neighbors are heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeereeeeee and they have a DOG! I hope she speaks DOG and not ALIEN like the last one!!!!
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Huh? Okay so I’m like so not ready to concede that moving to the country was a good call, but I could totally get used to this grass stuff. It’s summertime and this stuff is like so soft and cool to the touch! I think I will sniff around and see what’s up.
Oh, oh no. there is like HUGE ASS dude rapidly approaching me. Like bounding over here. OMG EW PUT YOUR TONGUE BACK INTO YOUR MOUTH AND APPROACH ME WITH SOME DECENCY!
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A dog, a dog, a dog! A GIRL dog! I should run, I should run, I should RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN over and say HELLO!!!!!
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He’s coming, he’s coming, he’s coming. OMG he is going to like totally run into me if he doesn’t stop right now!
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I’m running, I’m running, I’m running, I CAN’T STOP I’M SO EXCITED TO HAVE A NEW FRIEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Hunter was able to stop before he ran into Riley, but just barely. The force that his Golden Retriever body would’ve made in impact with her little Chihuahua/Papillon body would’ve been a whammy, but they would’ve both been fine.
Hunter was so excited that it made Riley nervous. When he wagged his tail, he wagged his whole body. When he wagged his whole body, he frantically sniffed and sniffed and sniffed her. She mostly cowered.
He finally got ahold of himself and sat dog regally, his golden fur shining in the sunlight. He said, “Hello I am Hunter and you are my new neighbor and I like bacon and squirrels and birds and YOU!”
She thought he was dopey and endearing. She sat down across from him, her own golden fur shining and large ears pointed straight up toward the sky. She said, “Hi, Hunter. I’m Riley. I’m from the city. We don’t really ‘do’ birds and squirrels.”
“WHAT WHAT WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!! I love you. That is okay. Let’s sniff around your yard. Oh look! SQUIRREL! I WILL GO GET HIM FOR YOU!! BE RIGHT BACK!!!!”
She sighed and walked over to the shade of the oak tree to lay down and watch him leap around the yard, secretly hoping that he’d come back with that squirrel after all.
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Okay, so like, mayyyyyyybe I could get used to living in the country. I mean, I’m not the only one who just heard that dude say he loves me, right? Like he is a big, burly guy, but I kind of like the big lug. Like, okay, I guess I’ll give it a try. WTF where is he with that squirrel? What even is a squirrel?
Marie Hendry 